"I teach you how to make exquisite love"
Real Female Ejaculations (aka squirt or squirting) & G-Spot Orgasm
Patti Taylor, PhD, interview Dr. Gary Schubach
Sex Educator, Lecturer, and Creator of DoctorG.com
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Transcript
PATTI TAYLOR: Hi, I’m Doctor Patti Taylor, and in this awesome show you’ll learn about g-spots, how many there really are, and how to pleasure them. Female ejaculation? What is this, and why are so many women feeling so empowered to have them? And props? Find out if and how they might help you have better g-spot orgasms.
PATTI TAYLOR: Welcome to the “Expanded Lovemaking” show. I’m your host, Dr. Patti Taylor, and I teach people how to make love. Today on the show we’re talking about g-spots and g-spot orgasms, and even the occasional dividend you get from a g-spot orgasm, known as ‘the female ejaculation’. Does it feel just as good when you just come out with a little as a lot, do you think, from the women you’ve been with?
GARY SCHUBACH: I think if they’re not, particularly if they’re not, worried about it. If they’re just in their experience, they can’t tell the difference.
PATTI TAYLOR: I know they all feel good to me, so whether, you know if I’m having a good time I’m not even paying attention, so I like them all.
PATTI TAYLOR: Our guest today is Gary Schubach, founder of www.DoctorG.com, a web site dedicated to bringing people information in this area. So welcome, Gary Schubach.
GARY SCHUBACH: Thank you, Patti. I may call you ‘Patti’, since we’re old friends.
PATTI TAYLOR: Well, it’s ‘Doctor Patti’ to some people, but to you it’s Patti, and I understand to most of the world it’s ‘DoctorG’ as well.
GARY SCHUBACH: Yes, I, well after I graduated people started calling me ‘Dr. Schubach’ and it felt too much like my father, and people used to call him ‘Mr. S’, so I started with the ‘DoctorG’ persona, but you can call me Gary since we’ve known each other so long.
PATTI TAYLOR: Well, thank you Gary, and anyway ‘DoctorG’ seems to fit the bill, I think. Well it’s great to have you here then, Gary. Anyway, I did choose you, Gary, for your expertise in this topic as well. Gary, you’re known for your expertise; you’re Associate Professor at the Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality. You lecture on this topic at various universities, institutes and conferences around the world, on this topic. You’re also a sex researcher who has performed pioneering research on the topic of female ejaculation. And you’re the founder of the web site www.DoctorG.com, who’s dedicated your career to offering the best articles, videos, information and products to helping men and women have hotter and juicier love lives. I’m pleased to have you here with us today.
I think our listeners have either heard about g-spot orgasms, or have had them, and in either case want to know more about them. So here’s our plan for today: We’ll learn what g-spot orgasms are, what female ejaculation is, why these are so compelling to so many men and women, and what you can do to have more of these in your life. So Gary, today I want to talk to you about this. What is a g-spot orgasm, and how to have them? What’s so juicy about female ejaculation, and what can couples specifically do to bring more pleasure to their ladies’ g-spots. So let’s start with our first question: What is the g-spot?
GARY SCHUBACH: Good question. The g-spot, put simply, is the female prostate. This has actually been, since the ‘g-spot’ term was coined in the early 80’s, because of the landmark book “The G-Spot and Other Recent Discoveries About Human Sexuality”. The term ‘g-spot’ was created by the publishers of that book, and while that is a term that has gained great acceptance across the world, or great recognition of the term g-spot, not many people really understand, including doctors, understand what we’re talking about here, and like I said, it is, put simply, just the female prostate.
It is very analogous to the male prostate, and like the male prostate it completely surrounds the urethra, closest to the urethral opening, ‘pee hole’ is what we commonly said, it is generally smaller in size on average than a male prostate, although you’ll find some women that have prostates that are larger than the smallest male prostates, so there are quite a variety in terms of the size of the glands, and particularly how large they will become when they’re stimulated. The g-spot, or the female prostate, can be stimulated in one of two ways: one is through the upper wall of the vagina, and that’s where the misunderstanding has come; there has been a misunderstanding that there is actually a spot on the upper wall of the vagina, and that is not correct. It’s what is on the other side of the upper wall of the vagina where you’ll find the female prostate, or the g-spot, so-called ‘g-spot’. And there is a second way to stimulate the female prostate, and this works for the male just as well as it works for the woman, and that is from the outside.
If a woman places her hand, or a man places his hand, on a woman’s groin just above her pubic bone and sort of press gently, most women will feel a slight sensation to pee and will… again because their urethral gland or prostate is being stimulated, and oftentimes when I’m stimulating a woman I’ll do both. With the fingers of one hand I’ll be stimulating her g-spot through the upper wall of her vagina, and then with the other hand I’ll be coming from her lower abdomen. And I can feel my hands meet, and that can be very pleasurable.
PATTI TAYLOR: Well thank you. Now just when you thought you’d heard it all, not only is there one g-spot, but there are multiple g-spots. So let me ask you… yes, you have more to say about that.
GARY SCHUBACH: Yeah, the funny thing is, the term ‘g-spot’ was coined from Ernst Grafenberg, who was an obstetrician who wrote an article in the early 50’s about all of this. It’s on my web site. And he only uses the word ‘spot’ in the article twice, and it’s used opposite of the way that we commonly use it. Grafenberg in essence is saying the same thing that I hear you saying in your books, which is that there isn’t any one spot, or two spots, or three spots; there are innumerable erotogenic spots on a woman and on a man’s body. We just haven’t discovered them yet.
PATTI TAYLOR: Well thank you very much, Gary. I do use the word ‘g-area’ for greater clarification, however the word ‘g-spot’ is in the culture and listening, so we defer to that. So let me ask you something, there seems to be some confusion among a lot of people that “is there a g-spot orgasm or is there just a clitoral orgasm?” What is your opinion on this?
GARY SCHUBACH: Well I think the research clearly shows that there are different nerve pathways, also in the case of the male. The nerve pathway from the female prostate or g-spot is to the pelvic nerve, through the pelvic nerve. On the clitoris it’s through the pudendal nerve. And those nerves go through different pathways to different areas of the brain. So when we read, and I know both you and I have both been reading Beverly Whipple’s new book, on…
PATTI TAYLOR: The Science of Orgasm?
GARY SCHUBACH: “The Science of Orgasm”, and Beverly Whipple is of course one of the authors of the book The G Spot: And Other Discoveries About Human Sexuality. You know it’s clear, anatomically, that these are different pathways. Now the second part of the equation is a woman’s experience, and that’s governed by not just the anatomical and the physical, but also the emotional. So physically yes, there is a definite difference in nerve pathways between a g-spot orgasm and a clitoral orgasm, and then on top of that is a woman’s perception, and how she can expand her feelings in all kinds of orgasms.
PATTI TAYLOR: Thank you, Gary. So if one of your readers were to call or write in and say, “DoctorG, I’m looking for my partner’s or my girlfriend’s g-spot. How do I find it?” What might be some basic advice you would give this person?
GARY SCHUBACH: Well first I would tell them to do everything they can to make their partner relax, just like with a man when a man is having a rectal examination, to explore, or even for pleasure, to explore his prostate, it is intimidating to women to go forward with a goal that involves penetrating them without them being properly prepared. So they need to be prepared in all ways. I always say that the g-spot orgasm, particularly female ejaculation, requires a strange combination of two things that would appear to be contradictory, but aren’t. One is extreme relaxation, and the other is extreme arousal. So first you want to do everything to make your partner comfortable, to let them know there is no goal or expectation, that you are there, in the moment, to enjoy each stroke, each moment.
Then from that, the best way after a woman is really fully aroused, I sometimes won’t even enter a woman with my fingers until she’s kind of pulled me in. I’ll tease her and warm her up on her lips and her clit, and do a variety of things… breathe with her and turn her on in every other way and I’ll just have my finger right at her introitus and I’ll just wait until she kind of pulls me in. Her body will let me know when she’s ready. And then, usually by stimulating the upper wall closest to the entrance, to the introitus, to the entrance to the vagina, I’ll start to feel the engorgement of her prostate or g-spot, and I’ll massage that, usually gently in the beginning, although many women will, once they’re fully aroused, will like a lot of pressure. There’ll be a feedback process where I’ll be determining that.
PATTI TAYLOR: Okay, well that sounds pretty inviting. How far in… is there a typical amount in that you would say, after your first knuckle, your second knuckle, would you say your fingers are going in? Is it one finger, or two fingers before you find the g-spot? Is it under the pelvic bone? Can you give us a sort of an internal map that a guy could sort of use to navigate inside?
GARY SCHUBACH: Okay. Again, this is a generality. Some women will have very prolific female prostate that will go up considerably, a considerable way up their urethra from their pee hole. I’ll always start with one finger, never more than one, and then if I feel that the woman wants a second one I can get more in. I’ll go in very close to the opening, maybe first knuckle, and then it’s kind of a, usually a hook up. That’s why we use products like the crystal wand that have kind of an S-shaped tip, so that I can kind of hook, up there, just inside of her, maybe just to my first knuckle, then I’ll hook up and attempt to feel it. And it should be noticeable. You should be able to feel the ridges. If the woman is properly aroused you should be able to start to feel the ridges. And I should mention that due to the filling of blood that you’ll feel, the area may change in the course of the session, depending on her female prostate gland. She may be engorged in one area at the beginning and another area later on, so you have to have a constant feedback loop, either verbal or nonverbal, to know how she’s feeling, and keep in contact with her, how she’s feeling.
PATTI TAYLOR: Mmmm, wow… starting to feel my g-spot. Heh, but I’ve had a little practice. So, the average woman, will she say, “Oh Honey, you’re on my prostate, wow!” Or will she know, or will the man know, or will the guy say, “Oh wow, gee, I feel this nice urethral sponge, and…” or will it mostly be different for everybody? What kind of… getting real technical now, how will someone know when they’re on the g-spot? Is it just because it feels great and the woman is just moaning in pleasure, or are there like road signs when we’re really there?
GARY SCHUBACH: There are a couple of road signs. Number one, there’s clear ridges and, and again I’m using engorgement, when is filling with blood. There’s a definite feeling of ridges and bumps, and then there’s a verbal cue that you can get which is that she’s feeling an urge to go to the bathroom, even after she may have just gone before we started! But if she tells me that at all, I know right away I’m in the right area.
PATTI TAYLOR: Uh huh, and does it feel really great?
GARY SCHUBACH: Yeah it feels great. I mean it feels good to my fingers… I’ve been trained that I’m having as good a time; my fingers are having as good a time as her g-spot. And it feels good to turn my partner on, to turn another human being on like that.
PATTI TAYLOR: Okay so follow the feeling. So if it’s just feeling better and better and better, then follow the feeling too…
GARY SCHUBACH: Well for the woman what you’ll usually have is that they’ll be getting more aroused and more aroused and I’ll start to see contractions and even there’ll be a… there can be like a ballooning out of the urethra, kind of pushing out so I can see it. Beverly Whipple calls that ‘eversion’. And then I know she’s usually close to an orgasm and perhaps an ejaculation, when I start to see that physiologically.
PATTI TAYLOR: Well we’re going to have to take a short break for our sponsors and we’re going to be right back. I’d like to say that some of the articles that Gary has been talking about can be found on your web site, www.DoctorG.com. So please stay with us. We will be right back.
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